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I started my journey of blogging in 2003 — mostly to capture what I called “transitioning life’s journey”.
In 2023 I took a 3 year break from blogging, but have decided to return to it. I hope you enjoy.
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Anxiety is Good…
Philosophers and Poets, from their perch on the cutting edge of reason, have always seen the advantage of anxiety. It is the “dizziness of reason,” argued Soren Kierkegaard; “the handmaiden of creativity,” said T.S. Eliot; “the beginning of conscience,” observed novelist Angela Carter. So have actors backstage, summoning eternal energies and edges for the roles […]
Do Churches Try and Protect Their Congregants from Anxiety?
A couple of weeks ago a friend of mine shared an article with me on my Facebook profile called, How to Land Your Kid in Therapy. It is a fascinating read for sure, and well worth your time. But I was especially taken by this passage: Paul Bohn, a psychiatrist at UCLA who came to […]
Managing Anxiety in the Family System: How Couples Can Do a Better Job of Owning Their Own Anxiety
I would estimate that in about 70%-80% of the situations in which kids are brought into my office for counseling, the presenting problems have less to do with the individual child, and more to do with what is happening in the larger family system, and more particularly in the couple’s marriage (or former marriage). The […]
Don’t Place Your Anxiety on Your Kids
A few weeks ago I taught a parenting class at Highland Park Presbyterian Church where I made the claim that many of the anxieties that children experience are due to issues within the family and marital unit at large, rather than just in the individual kid. This isn’t just my own belief, but something I […]
Theological Anxiety: Underneath All the Theological Debating
I believe that underneath all of the current theological debate is a theological anxiety that is intolerable to many people. The need for certainty in everything is a way to assuage one’s anxiety…an anxiety that is normal as we wrestle with the things of God. We must be able to live with a certain amount […]
Ministry Leadership: Being ‘Authentic’ Doesn’t Mean ‘Bleeding All Over the Congregation’
It seems that everyone is searching for ‘authenticity’ in their leaders. At least a younger generation of people are wanting this ‘authenticity’. In fact, Thomas Rainer who co-authored The Millennials: Connecting to America’s Largest Generation with his son Jess Rainer, recently wrote this in the article 4 Things Millennials Want in Their Leaders: 3. Transparency […]
Anxiety as a Tool for Growth
“Whoever has learned to be anxious in the right way has learned the ultimate.” —Søren Kierkegaard in The Concept of Anxiety Anxiety can be a very helpful tool in our lives. Unfortunately we have too often thought of anxiety as an indication of something wrong in us. Sometimes we equate it to a lack of […]
What If? The Scariest and Most Crucial Question in a Relationship
I feel like I do some of my best thinking and reflecting while out on a run. And while I was running yesterday a few stanzas from the Coldplay song, What If? really stuck out to me… What if you should decide That you don’t want me there by your side That you don’t want […]
Kierkegaard and Anxiety
“But attempts to evade anxiety are not only doomed to failure. In running from anxiety you lose your most precious opportunities for the emergence of yourself, and for your education as a human being. ‘If a man were a beast or an angel, he would not be able to be in anxiety. Since he is […]
When Should I Go See a Therapist?
[image by Ted Percival] This is a great question and was actually brought to my attention by a comments thread over on Facebook. In fact, one can Google this question and you will find a variety of answers, ranging from very specific things, to a more broad and general feeling of “feeling down” or “depressed.” […]
Step Into Your Anxiety If You Want To Grow
Recently I have been listening to the audio version of the David Snarch’s book Passionate Marriage: Sex, Love, and Intimacy in Emotionally-Committed Relationships. One of the things that he says in the lecture is (and I’m restating in my own words): That in order for a person to grow, they must step into their anxiety. […]